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The Ides of March - 2000

In Loving Memory.

Rick taught me: 


Fries are better with mayo

Let your dog run free

Righty tighty, lefty loosey

How to hoot like an owl

Bird feeders are cool

Check your tire pressure

Use the proper tool for the job,

And put it away when done

Always stop to help a stranded biker

How to make an omelet

Fishing is complicated

Duct tape is the handyman’s secret weapon

Don’t ride alongside a tractor-trailer

How to make a snow fort

Deer make noises

To be more assertive

Carry a camera in the car

Big trucks can get stuck on wet newspaper

Alka Seltzer makes seagulls explode

Don’t ride the clutch

(but I do anyway)

What a buck rub was

You can never have too much chrome

Flying J’s aren’t just for big trucks

How to use a wood stove

You can tell a woman’s age by her hands

Mexico is cheaper

There’s quite a bit of room in a sleeper cab

Red squirrels are bad squirrels

How to calculate gas mileage

Big tires are better

The higher the truck, the closer to God

To try new foods once in a while

Mary Kitchen corned beef hash is yummy

When you pass a big truck,

They can see what you’re doing

How to build a proper bonfire,

And be careful if you use gas to get it going

Don’t fidget in the woods,

If you sit still long enough,

Chipmunks forget you are there and sit on your boot

No one likes a JB Hunt driver

Labs are great dogs

How to figure miles on a map

You get traffic tickets when you don’t pay attention

Classic cars are better than new ones

Never stop in the middle of a mud hole

Pepsi is better than Coke

You jackknife when the trailer wants to go first

A good butt rub can solve anything

Don’t rush through an antique store

How to paddle a canoe

Loud pipes save lives

Tuck and roll

How to lean into a turn

A thermos keeps hot things hot and cold things cold

How to butcher a deer

You can catch a trout with a worm

It takes a lot of effort to grow an avocado tree

Most people are stupid

Helmet laws suck

Diesel fuel doesn’t explode

How to cut down a tree,

And split the wood for the stove

California is expensive

To slow dance at different tempos

A run to Rochester makes a fine date

How to use a snowplow

Fireworks piss of the neighbor’s dog

You need to plug in a big truck during freezing weather

Fill the water kettle every time you go in the basement

How to stack wood properly

Pop tastes better out of glass bottles

Don’t use 4-wheel drive on dry pavement

To hold hands whenever you can

Check your oil every week

Keep at least $100 in your wallet at all times

How to downshift

Suck up to your neighborhood bike shop owner

To ride with attitude

Chicken wings are pretty tasty

Raccoons can scream loud enough to wake you up

Mile markers in New York State run backwards

How to use a tachometer

Keep the hammer down

To keep the shiny side up

You can find love on the CB radio!




( 2 comments — Leave a comment )
Mar. 16th, 2009 09:47 am (UTC)
"The higher the truck, the closer to God"

That's the coolest thing I've heard, ever! Rick sounds like a guy to miss utterly. Pity the ones that keep hanging around. :-(
Mar. 16th, 2009 12:53 pm (UTC)
Yes, he was a very funny guy. It took a long time to get over his death. But life goes on, I survived, and he would be proud of me.
BTW, Happy belated BD.
( 2 comments — Leave a comment )



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